remember the days when you could just slap omni-gel on everything
Back in my day we didn't have Nintendo Wii, and our thumbs had calluses the size of quarters.
hes been a perpetual child for 30 years (r.i.p)
you cant play football without feet call it hand egg instead.
you throw an actual egg
Cook it, marinate for 12 hours in yogurt, wrap in bacon, then eat it.